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Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Troop 1/2Ass Goes Camping

I will never be "Mother of . . ." this or any other year. If you all knew how many times on any given day, I screw up, where my child is concerned, you would . . . well, that depends on who you are and whether you like me or not. But I'm here to tell you, I screw up daily. HOWEVER. I do manage to know where my kid IS! Almost all of the time. I know I just wrote about this stuff, but what is wrong with these people?! I feel like I've landed in the freakin' Parenting Twilight Zone.

Last year, and indeed, for the 3 years prior to that, LG was in a Grrl Scawt Troop with a very experienced, very competent leader. This year, that Leader had to resign for personal reasons (nothing scandalous), and now we're in a "co-op troop," which means that while we have a titular leader (yea, I knew you'd like that), no one is really in charge.

These emails were exchanged today. Names changed to protect the incompetent.

From: Iminna Fogg i.fogg@gmail.com
[Add to Address Book]
To: All the Moms of all the girls in Troop 1/2Ass
Subject: Our Camping Trip
Date: Tuesday, April 24, 2007 10:53:50 AM

Don't forget that this Saturday is our big [one and only of the whole year] camping trip! We will leave for Camp Woodpecker at 10 a.m. on Saturday, and return at 11 a.m. on Sunday. Camp Woodpecker is about 3 hours away from Pretty City . . . blah blah

Here are the carpool arrangements . . . blah blah


From: Susie Fairchild whatwasit@comcast.net
[Add to Address Book]
To: Iminna Fogg i.fogg@gmail.com
Subject: RE: Our Camping Trip
Date: Tuesday, April 24, 2007 11:20:30 AM

Ohmygosh, I'm so glad you sent this! Of course I knew this weekend was the camping trip, but I had written down that it was to Camp Bufflehead! That's like, only 1/2 an hour away! Thanks again . . .


From: Iminna Fogg i.fogg@gmail.com
[Add to Address Book]
To: All the Moms of all the girls in Troop 1/2Ass
Subject: RE:RE: Our Camping Trip
Date: Tuesday, April 24, 2007 11:30:50 AM

Oops! I goofed. Our [one and only major event of the whole year] camping trip is to Camp Bufflehead. See you Saturday!


Oh, cheez whiz! Are y'all sure you don't just wanna camp in our backyard again? I'd feel a lot better about things . . .

17 heads are better than one . . .

Blogger eclectic said...

For the record, I'm still traumatized by your comment header that proclaims, "Zero heads are better than one", given that I'm the "one" head referred to. *sigh*

Now, on to the topic at hand: I think Camp Wood-pecker is where the boy scawts go. I'm glad you're not taking LG there.

Blogger Squirl said...

I remember that post. What a ditz, though! Sounds like your backyard is the best place for the kids.

tee hee, Eclectic.

Blogger Sometimes Saintly Nick said...

Ugh. You bring into my mind the memories of when I was involved as a leader in Cub and Boy Scouts. It's really more difficult that one imagines.

As for camping, my son Rob's Boy Scout troop was always camping. Disastrously! It usually rained on the campers. One time a tornado even struck the camp site. (The campers had quickly left but when they returned to the site the tents, sleeping bags, etc. had been destroyed).

Their camping history was so bad that once, in the mist of a particularly dry spell, the local farmers petitioned the troop to go camping so that it would rain.

Blogger Bucky Four-Eyes said...

Left up to this woman, all the grrrls would end up at different campgrounds.

Blogger Circus Kelli said...

Oh my gosh, Susie...

I just caught up on reading your blog (because really, this working at work thing is really cutting into my surfing blogs at work thing big time) and I want to say I cried with you about the tragedy at VT, I was outraged and befuddled with you about the other parents, and I giggled with you about the church story and 82 year old Miss Venus.

The thing that makes the happiest, though is that you had 15 vials of blood drawn and SOMEBODY SOMEWHERE is actually actively trying to figure out WTF is going on with you!

Love you lots, Susie Q. Big hugs!

Blogger Von Krankipantzen said...

I'm thinking a satelite tracking device should be strapped onto LG's ankle just in case. I am serious.


Blogger mrtl said...

I second Kranki. I saw a GPS thing that you attach to the kid's shoe in some magazine. They do exist.

Maybe a cellphone for LG as well... just in case she needs to call for backup.

Blogger Nina said...

Some days I am thankful that my three are grown. And we made it there with all four of us alive.

Blogger little sister said...

between this and the previous post, I also second Kranki's suggestion for a GPS device attachment to LG's ankle.


Blogger Susie said...

eclectic, your head is better than zero. Heads. There, is that better?
I hope it is many, many years before LG goes to Camp Woodpecker.

squirl, I know. And I can't go and do these things now, so my kid is at the mercy of ditzes. Or I keep her home. I'm trying not to be overprotective, but, geez . . .

ssnick, now, that is funny, the farmers counting on you all for rain :)

bucky, ain't it the truth?

ck, thanks honey, AND I got a message yesterday to call that doc today. Oh, I HOPE she has some news. Good news.

kranki, that is not a bad idea. And now I'm thinking of taking her to the vet and having her microchipped.

mrtl, if LG read this, you would be her new favorite person. She desperately wants a selfone. I'd better look into it, I guess. I think they have special kid plans.

nina, I know; it's like Survivor: Childhood

lilsis, I know. I really don't live in a village of idiots, but you'd think, from all the goings on lately . . .

Blogger WILLIAM said...

You should let the kids camp in the backyard and get LG a GPS chip...or an elkectric fence type thing.:)

Sidenote: Susie I am soo soo glad to see regular posts and comments on other blogs from you. It must mean (or at least to me it menas) that you are feeling better.

Blogger Effie said...

boy oh boy--I miss a coupla days online and you post 3 times!! I agree with your knowing where LG is at all times post--you're not an uncool mom--you're a GOOD mom!

And that lady probably feels pretty silly right about now...

oh--my word verif is: ctimehu
which means: see time you...
I guess I should look at the time and get off the computer, eh?!

Blogger Andrea said...

Just rolling my eyes...

Blogger lawyerchik said...

"Microchipped" - (snork!!)

That was funny.....

Anonymous Elizabeth said...

Whahahahahahaha @ Eclectic...Camp Woodpecker for the Boi Skawts.....tee heee

Blogger Susie said...

william, I do have to choose a tracking/containment method for LG.

Truth? I'm not doing well. But I am being stubborn. I'm trying to keep doing what I would do if I didn't have WTF. I can for a while, then I crash. No answers in sight.

effie, I have been rather chatty, haven't I? Aren't we due for some new baby pix from you?

andrea, heh.

lawyerchik, :) Yea, maybe if I get her and the VBD done at the same time, they'll give me a deal.

elizabeth, I think eclectic still volunteers as a counselor there ;)

Anonymous Ortizzle said...

Oh, yeah, if these are the people leading, God help those who are following. I would have gone batshit, too.


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