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Friday, April 13, 2007

What I Did on My Friday the 13th

Thank you, kind, dear people for checking in, for praying, for thinking of me. I had the EMG. It was negative. That is very good news. When the New Rollogist said, "It's good news and bad news," I knew it was good news. "Positive" would have been "confirming for ALF." He said a couple of months ago that "negative" wouldn't rule ALF out, but between his clinical judgment and the negative EMG, I am now choosing to rule ALF out. The "bad news" that he referred to is, of course, that I still have all the symptoms but no diagnosis or treatment. I'm still waiting for blood tests from the neuro and the endocrine doc. Don't know what WTF is, but I'm choosing to think and behave, as much as possible, as though it is not a life-threatening illness. It is life-altering, for sure, but it won't kill me. I will kill it first.

Now, in case anyone ever offers you an EMG, just say NO. The first part was the shocking of the muscles in my arms and legs. The doc said it would be comparable to what a dog feels when he's shocked by an invisible fence. (This is the same doc who said I have fleas and ticks; I think the man is calling me a dog.) The first few shocks were unpleasant, but when he asked me if I was OK, I said, "Yea . . . that's not so bad; I'd still jump the fence." A few shocks later, though, I did yelp and say, "Now THAT would keep me in the yard." It relieves my anxiety if I can make medical types laugh.

After the shocking came the needles into the muscles. That smarts. I didn't look at them, I knew better, but Jif said they were long; inches long, and they went quite far in. It hurt. After the arm and leg, he did one in my face and one in my tongue. That was the worst.

Anyhow, tonight I feel just like I've been electrocuted and had long needles stuck in my muscles, but the news was as good as it could be, from that test.

Thank you, friends. I hope your Friday the 13th is a good news day, too. Without the electrocution and the needles. Unless you're into that kinda thing.

33 heads are better than one . . .

Anonymous Sharkey said...

No ALF! No ALF! Woohoo!

It must feel good to have those tests over, if nothing else. And I'm so glad you got results today, instead of having to wait and agonize over the weekend. I hope it feels like a little bit of weight lifted off your shoulders, at least.

Thanks for letting us know how things went. Now rest. :) And have a good weekend.

Blogger Momentarily_Distracted said...

*dancing and confetti*
No ALF! No ALF! YAY!!!
Thank you for the update! :)

Blogger Mr. Bloggerific Himself said...

*thinks we ought to send a song to WTF*

"Call Me a Dog"
By Temple of the Dog

You call me a dog well thats fair enough
cause it aint no use to pretend
Youre wrong
When you call me out I cant hide anymore
I have no disguise you cant see through

Well you say its bad luck
To have fallen for me
Well what can I say to make it good for you
You wore me out like an old winter coat
Trying to be safe from the cold

But when its my time to throw
The next stone
Ill call you beautiful if I call at all

You tell me Im low cause Ive slept on the floor
And out in the woods with the badgers & wolves
You threw me out cause I went digging for gold
And I came home with a handful of coal

But when its my time to throw the next stone
Ill call you beautiful if I call at all
And when its my time to call your bluff
Ill call you beautiful or leave it alone
You call me a dog
Well thats fair enough
It doesnt bother me as long as you know
Bad luck will follow you
If you keep me on a leash and
You drag me along

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I thought about you all day today sweetie! I'm finally getting here and I'm so grateful to know your test was negative. You are so brave. Peace.

Blogger Sometimes Saintly Nick said...

Congratulations on the good news, Susie!!!!!!!! I pray WTF will be identified soon. You have been in limbo much too long.

I hear your words and will avoid an EMG, as well as any other medical procedure that I can.

Much shalom and many blessings to ya!

Anonymous Allisone said...

Yay!!! No ALF!!!
But whatever happend with the orange jug o' pee?

Blogger Lynn said...

Yes, Susie, I think you are right to go with what this doc says and then just go ahead and rule ALF out of your head for sure. I, too, think that is life-altering, but not life-threatening. It could still go away, though.

What with the fences, ticks and fleas -- do you think maybe this doc used to be a vet? Or maybe he's married to one!

Blogger Andrea said...

Lucky Friday the 13th :)

Anonymous stringmuse said...

Yaaaayyy! And ...

Blogger eclectic said...

Well now, that's something! I'm relieved this day is over, and thrilled that the medical types now know as much as we do -- YOU DON"T HAVE ALF!!! Now, if we can just smart them up a little more...

You get big, bright stars for bravery today, Sis. Thanks for sharing your news with us.

Blogger Von Krankipantzen said...

You are a warrior! You have gone through a barbaric needle ritual and come out the other side with your sense of humour intact and some good news as well.

I'd suggest a tattoo to commemorate this momentous occasion but now that I think about it maybe that isn't the best idea.

A warm blankie and a glass of wine might be better.


Anonymous soozieq said...

Wow! Your description of the needles literally made me cringe. My tongue tried to slither down the back of my throat and then I dry heaved and threw up a little in my mouth. You ARE a rockstar!!! NO ALF, yah baby. That is such good news. Now we just need to find out WTF this is and how to treat it. Medical community...GET ON IT!

Blogger Nina said...

Well I did get good news today and it confirmed what I already knew. That it isn't ALF or some other alien. It is still Friday the 13th mountain time. So thanks for sharing the good news.

Blogger Ern said...

Friday the thirteenth has always been a lucky day for me.

I'm glad it was for you today too.


Blogger The other me said...

Cheering and clapping at the ruling out of ALF! YEAY! The needles and shcoking tests sound truky barbaric but so worth it to rule out the nasty ALF thing. I had fishing wire pulled across my eyeballs once to rule out retinitis pigmentosa, who thinks up these hideous tests?? Anway great news, may there be more of that to come!

Blogger Squirl said...

Yay!! No ALF!!! I'm sorry you had to go through the electric shocks. But I'm so happy that it came out negative.

I spent a wonderful Friday the 13th evening with my baby sister and Ichabod. Always have considered Friday the 13th a lucky day for me.

Okay, sister, now we just need to find out what is going on with you so you can get on the right regimen and feel better. And, since the doctor is making all the dog references, did you tell him you also have booty flies?

Anonymous trophywife said...

Yay!! No ALF!! That is the best news! I'm sorry about the shocks and the needles. ow!
I think after that you deserve a nice belly rub, a pat on the head and a new sqeaky toy. ; )

Anonymous kalki said...

Big happy dance here! I know it doesn't rule ALF out, but this is a pretty big kick to the balls of that potential diagnosis. Wooohooo!

I am so glad you have Jif to be with you through this. For every appointment, you mention that he's there. And that makes me cry a little, in a good way.

Anonymous kalki said...

Hee, chuckling at trophywife's comment.

Truth is, I considering sending you a flea and tick collar... ;)

Anonymous Ortizzle said...

Great news that it came out negative for ALF!!! As you so aptly said, whatever else WTF is, it's beatable.

Enjoy your weekend and not having to pee into a large red vat!

Anonymous Jeannie said...

No-o ALF, No-o ALf, No-o ALF, NO ALF. Suzie is clear of the dreaded ALF! MERRY SATURDAY!

Blogger SassyFemme said...

Doing the Snoopy Happy Dance in celebration of the good news! Very happy for you, and your family!

Anonymous peaches said...

Thank God not ALF. I keep you in my prayers and thoughts and I'm going to add you to my Church's prayer list.

Yes, you read correctly. My Church. Come by for a peek, the last 2 posts mark the spot.

I had an EMG done last month I think. I still have bruises left. It was one of the most terrible, horrible, never again in my life things I want to do. But, mine was also negative, so that means I dont have permanent nerve damage, just TONS of nerve pain in my arms.

I love you my sweet friend.


Blogger Circus Kelli said...

YAY FOR NO ALF!! I never did like that furry beast anyway. If anyone needs a flea and tick collar, it's him.

Love you bunches, Susie.

Anonymous Kelly said...

Whoohoo! no ALF! fantastic susie, way to go. I am fearful I woke my toddler twins with the "YESSSS!" I exclaimed reading your post....but totally worth it ;) more good Canadian Karma coming your way... this instant I raise my glass of white wine, and a saltine cracker with smoked oyster in your honour. Love to you and Jiff and LG.

Blogger Circus Kelli said...

Hey... I meant to tell you... I saw a sign the other day that made me think of you. The sign said "WTF Free Food". I'm not exactly sure what the true meaning was, but I grinned.

word verf: vcohoha

Hoo haa!

Blogger Nilbo said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

Blogger Nilbo said...

NO ALF! Good Susie! Good Susie! Who's a good widda girl? Who's a good widda girl? Is it you? Yes you are! Yes you are! C'mere you ... (scratching behind your ear) ...

That's SUCH a good gi --- OK, stop that. No! No humping my leg! Stop it! BAD girl, Susie. BAD.

Anonymous platypus said...

My immediate reaction when I read this: "Oh, thank God!" I have never meant anything so wholeheartedly in my entire life. Stumpy heard me and asked what it was so I told her and she said, "See, we knew it was our lucky day!" Stumpy was born on Friday the 13th so for us it's very lucky and now it's lucky for you too. I am thrilled for you. I know it doesn't change what you battle on a daily basis but I am so, so pleased for that result, even with the electric shocks. Lots of love as always, and thank God. :)

Anonymous LadyBug said...

Praise God, from Whom all blessings flow. That's welcome news, indeed. It's about time you got some good news for a change, Miss Susie.

But Good GOLLY, that sounds painful. I'm so glad it's over.

Love, hugs, and many, many prayers for you, my friend.

Anonymous Pat said...

Long needles? In your tongue? Yuck! It makes my tongue ache!

But I'm so glad for the negative ALF. And impressed with the courage it took for you to do the test.

Now one to identifying and treating WTF.

Blessings to you and your family!


Susie, you got some brass ovaries on you, going through that test. I'm so happy to hear about these results! Yes, dancing and confetti definitely are called for. (Plus, some nice tongue-numbing alcohol.)

Blogger Amy said...

Oh my lovely, So glad to read this!


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