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Monday, April 23, 2007

"I'm trying to live a quiet, peaceful life and stay out of trouble, and all it is, is one thing after another . . . "

Really pissed me off disgruntled me: LG went to a friend's house for dinner and to go see a play, a little theater play in which another of their friends was performing. Actually, she went to the little girl's father's house, where the little girl visits every other weekend. The Dad said that he would have LG home by 9 p.m.

9 p.m. comes and goes. No problem, they probably went backstage, blah blah.

9:30 p.m. comes and goes.

10:00 p.m. comes and goes.

Now I start to get worried/pissed disgruntled. Frankly, now I start to have flutters of panic. Which makes me even more pissed disgruntled, because I haven't had a panic attack in about two and a half years.

They arrived home at 10:25 p.m. Yea, I know she was with a parent, but that parent had both a watch and a cell phone. I say he was totally inconsiderate, and a horrible example to my (and his own) preteen daughter about what to do when you're going to be later than you said you would be.

::tangent:: The ex-wife of this man, the one the child lives with most of the time, is the parent who, when I agreed to drop off LG at their house for a two-hour playdate while I did some errands, loaded the girls in her car and went all over the place. One of my errands, while I thought my daughter was safely parked at this neighbor's home, was to Petco (where the pets go). Imagine my surprise when, there by the fish, I see LG and her friend. And no Mom. I stood there talking to them, and eventually the Mom joined us, all apologetic, not that she had taken LG to the store in the first place, but that she had let them go off alone in the store. She assured me that she would never do this in a place like, for example, Target, but that Petco (where the pets go) was small enough that she felt OK doing that. I learned later that not only had they gone to Petco (where the pets go), but that earlier in the day, this Mom had lost her cell phone. And a strange man from the next town over had called her to tell her he had it. And she had taken my daughter and her own to this strange man's house, the next town over, to retrieve her cell phone. ALL OF THIS when I had agreed only that LG could come over and hang out in their basement for a couple of hours.

I realize I risk solidifying my "uncool Mom" status with this rantangent, but I am the Mom who, when LG and the little girl with whom she's been walking to school returned home one morning, saying the sidewalks were too icy, would I please drive them to school, I said of course I would, then I sat in my car and would not, could not, back out of my driveway before I phoned that little girl's Mom to explain the situation, and tell her that I was happy to drive little Uma to school, but did not want to take her anywhere in my car without her mother's knowledge and consent. Which, of course, her mother gave. But that is a thing with me, dammit! Don't put my kid in your car and take her somewhere when I believe you are keeping her at your house! And I'll extend you the same courtesy. ::end tangent::
Oh, and LG just now told me that Dr. Dad (yea, the non-custodial, no-calling Dad is an M.D.) also left the girls at home alone when he went out to get their pizza. Not that I wouldn't do that; but I wouldn't do that without asking the girl's parents if they minded, if she minded, etc. In this house, 10-11 is the age where we're just beginning to let LG be home alone, for very short periods of time. I would not presume that other parents are doing that, or that it's OK with them if I leave their child unsupervised. (I know; go ahead and make me my "uncool Mom" hat.)

Really encouraged me:
Had 15 vials of blood drawn on Thursday. No, that's not the encouraging part; that's the part that says they still don't know WTF WTF is. The encouraging part was that even though no one knows, the endocrinologist really seems to be working on it. Because of the mysterious disappearance of my Vitamin D, she sent me to a dietician in her office. And the dietician seems really nice and smart. She even called on Friday to ask me some more questions, and tell me she is researching malabsorption disorders. So, yea, it encourages me that finally someone's thinking about me when I'm not sitting in front of them; and it encourages me that an M.D. is human enough and humble enough to call a "lowly dietician" and say, as the dietician told me she did, "I don't know what's wrong with this patient; will you listen to her story and see if you can come up with any ideas that we can pursue?" So, whether or not they come up with anything, it encourages me that we have not exhausted all possibilities, and that there are medical professionals like these two, out there.

Cracked. Me. UP.
: LG and Jif came home from Sunday School telling this story. Jif and another man were teaching the children's lesson. Three-year-old Michael was hanging on every word they said. The other teacher finished the line in the story, "Jesus told Peter, 'You will deny me three times before the cock crows.'" At that very moment, Jif sneezed loudly. For a second, little Michael seemed to try to incorporate the sneeze into the story, but he wasn't buying it. He said, "Hey, that was no cock! That was Mr. Jif!"

Did my heart good
(from Comcast news):

WAYNESBURG, Ky. - Miss America 1944 has a talent that likely has never appeared on a beauty pageant stage: She fired a handgun to shoot out a vehicle's tires and stop an intruder. Venus Ramey, 82, confronted a man on her farm in south-central Kentucky last week after she saw her dog run into a storage building where thieves had previously made off with old farm equipment.

Ramey said the man told her he would leave. "I said, 'Oh, no you won't,' and I shot their tires so they couldn't leave," Ramey said.

She had to balance on her walker as she pulled out a snub-nosed .38-caliber handgun.

"I didn't even think twice. I just went and did it," she said. "If they'd even dared come close to me, they'd be 6 feet under by now."

Ramey then flagged down a passing motorist, who called 911.

After winning the pageant with her singing, dancing and comedic talents, Ramey sold war bonds and her picture was adorned on a B-17 that made missions over Germany in World War II, according to the Miss America Web site.

"I'm trying to live a quiet, peaceful life and stay out of trouble, and all it is, is one thing after another," she said.

In spite of my gun-control views expressed around the innernets as a hole last week, I say, "Hell yea!" to gun-toting 82-year-old former Miss Americas who are just trying to stay out of trouble.

24 heads are better than one . . .

Blogger Andrea said...

Egads. I say uncool moms are the "new" cool moms. I'm with you on this. I'm thinking I will be collecting cell phone numbers of all adults Audrey (and my other girls, when they are older) may be in the care of in case of such things happening.

Blogger lawyerchik said...

Sounds like the other parents in your neighborhood think kids just raise themselves; all they have to do is water them once in a while.....

WHOO-HOO about the dietician involvement!!! I'm SO keeping my fingers crossed that it's something treatable!!!! (BTW, my word verification word is sewxxlbd - someone else is keeping their fingers crossed for you, too!!)

And about Miss America - I say, "Granny, get that gun!" :) I understand we may have, um, different opinions about gun control laws, but I think that if the students at VA Tech had been allowed to carry guns, that guy wouldn't have made it past one shot (maybe 2) before getting drawn on himself. Might have saved a whole lot of tragedy.

(Which is why I'm buying a .22 or a 9 mm this year - still haven't decided, but my brother who is a former Marine and a current police officer is taking me to the gun range this July 4 to try a few out for size......)

Hope this week brings good news, Susie!!!

Anonymous sheryl said...

I love you, Susie. And if you're an Uncool Mom, I am an Uncool Auntie. More power to you.

And YAY! GO, Nutritionist!!

Please help us fill in the *WHAT* in the WTF.

Blogger Susie said...

andrea, cell phone numbers are essential. At LG's recent b'day party at the mall, I had all the kids and parents sign a safety contract, and put cell phone numbers on there, which I've kept. On Saturday night, I actually called Dr. Dad's cell phone a little after 10, but he didn't answer.

lawyerchik, yea, and I'm afraid it's not just my neighborhood.

Thanks for the WHOO-HOO :) I'm still hoping for treatable.

I used to be in the Gun & Marksmanship Club in high school. We shot skeet. I was pretty good at it. I hate guns, now. I just want the mental illness thing to show up when a background check is done. And a few other things; I don't think my views are extreme; yours probably aren't, either. I will say, though, that I don't want to sit in a classroom where everyone's packing heat. But that's just me.

sheryl, I love you, too. If you're uncool, too, then I say we drop the "un." I hope and pray that this is a vitamin problem. No one, so far, has been able to link the symptoms with that, but still . . .

Blogger Nina said...

I use to tell my kids, being an uncool mom was on my job description.
I some how managed to have three children grow to be emotionally healthy, mature, adults. As well as responsible, etc . . . ;)

Anonymous Sharkey said...

So I'm curious about what you said to Dr. Dad, and what his reaction was. An hour and a half late with no call? No excuse for that.

Fifteen vials of blood! I hope you got a cookie before they sent you on your way. Crossing my fingers and praying that they come up with something for you. But hooray for docs who care!

Anonymous LadyBug said...

It sounds silly, I think, but I just wanted you to know how very much I enjoyed reading this post.

And I guess you and I will be twins in our "Uncool Mom" hats.

Love, hugs, and many, many prayers, my friend...

Blogger mrtl said...

Since when do playdates happen in the backseat of a car while the driver does errands?

The doctors have taken an interest. Wonderful! Maybe you'll become a superstah, going on hospital tours to test skills, or you could go on a game show, "Guess My Ailment."

I saw the Miss America on Today. Awesome!!

Anonymous Elizabeth said...

..aww, HAILS naw!....I cannot believe the woman took the girls to a stangers house across town..playdate my ba-donk-a-donk..all of their actions in general are "out there" I'm with whoever, "uncool is the new cool"...jeeez..and tee hee at Miss America. I agree, mental illness should be included in a background check for purchasing guns. My hub graduated Va Tech, he's beside himself..we live 7 miles outside of DC, I had no idea how lax our gun laws are here in VA...hopefully that's about to change. Hugs Susie.

Blogger Squirl said...

I never have to think about the "uncool mom" thing as I've never had kids. You sure make sense with what you say, though. You go, girl!

It's hard to type with my fingers crossed for you on the nutrition! Let's hope this is the one that works. I'm really excited over this one.

Love you, hang in there, sis.

Blogger eclectic said...

At 82, if she can keep someone half her age or younger at bay using a snubnose .38, she's tougher than I'll ever be!

And Dr. Dad and Errand Mom are officially off my playdate list. If playdates are happening, they're happening at my house, not either one of their homes. Of COURSE you would call me if plans changed -- either because of transportation, or the need to run an unexpected errand, or an unforseen delay in return time -- because that's what you DO when you're responsible for someone else's offspring. Gah! My blood is boiling because it's not just an ettiquette issue, it's a guardianship issue.

Three cheers for the MD/RD combo of super-sleuths!! May their work be richly rewarded by the answer to this puzzle. Soon too, if it's not too much trouble. ;)

Anonymous RzDrms said...

i would've taken my daughter home with me from petco (where the pets go). and i probably would've told that mom where to go too.

Blogger Lynn said...

Susie, there is a big difference between being an uncool Mom and just being smart and responsible. You are smart and responsible. That makes you extra cool in my book!

I love me a sassy granny :-)

Blogger whfropera said...

rzdrms I think I agree.

Susie - this entire episode is making MY head explode, and I don't even have kids.

Keeping fingers and toes crossed about WTF.

I saw this boys site and thought of you - I'm not sure why - maybe because he too has a difficult disease to deal with and still is pretty chipper. And damn funny - Heck-bert is my new friend, even with only one lock of hair.


Anonymous kalki said...

Hee, I do the Petco (where the pets go) thing too. Every. Time. Because, seriously, how can you not?! We now also have a PetSmart (where the pets fart).

Blogger Sandi said...

Sorry, but there is NOTHING "uncool" about protecting your kids. I would have been totally freaked out if I left my kids with someone and had all the experiences you did!

Blogger Sometimes Saintly Nick said...


As for the gun-toting 82-year-old former Miss America, we Kentuckians are better shots than westerners. We been shootin' a lot longer.


Hmmmm...lots to think about here. First, congratulations on having some doctors doing it the right way. I feel more and more optimistic about what's happening with WTF.

On to being an "uncool" mom. I don't have kids; I have a passel of young nieces and I'm a godmother to 3 boys. When I used to take my young godson out I would always call his mom whenever we changed location, even if it was part of the plan. You were kinder to Dr. Dad than I would have been - the cops would have been at his door by then if that had been me. I have zero tolerance for that kind of crap. Gone are the days when I was a kid and we would disappear a mile into the woods in the back of our house for the whole day. All your precautions make you a cool MOM - aka, a parent. You know, someone who has kids and then takes responsibility for their safety and well-being on a minute-by-minute basis, not just when it's convenient. Years ago, when I was a retail manager, you wouldn't believe the parents dropping their kids off in the store as if we were babysitters. I always called security on them, without one drop of regret. Sorry to have ended up blogging on your space, Susie, but that behavior makes my blood boil.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey girl, I love this old lady! When I'm 82, I wanna be just like her!

As for the vitamin D thing, in my own quest for better health, I've recently learned there is more than one kind of vitamin D. Did you know that?? Apparently some of them are more easily used by the body. Just FYI sweetie. Love you.

Blogger WILLIAM said...

Just wear does an 82 year old lady with a walker keep her handgun? Does he have a shoulder holster?

I love your stories and I am encouraged that your physicians and dieticians are working for you.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

And this is why my children will not have friends and we will live in isolation on the homestead.... I swear.

Can my uncool mom hat be one of those crochet beer-can hats?

(Blogger still hates me.)

Anonymous deneen said...

How could you possibly be an uncool mom? Anyone that allows lifesize cutouts of Legolas to hang around and decorates him seasonally is in no way uncool.

I have posted the answers to my questions. I know you are just beside yourself to know the answer to number 3.

Be okay today. Let's just aim for okay.

Blogger Von Krankipantzen said...

Not being a mom I probably shouldn't comment but Dayum! Being that late would piss me off. And taking LG to a stranger's house for the cell phone thing-REALLY wrong. I think IF I had kids whether I would be OK with play-date plan changes would depend A LOT on how well I knew the parents etc. but the way I work is that I would phone the parent if I was watching their kid to let them know any changes in plans. I am uber responsible that way. However, I totally remember my friends' parents doing very irresponsible things with me when I was in their care. Driving around in the back of a station wagon without seatbelts rings a bell as well as being on a small boat in the ocean without any sort of life jackets available also happened. I don't think my parents probably would have cared much either. Those were the unsafe and carefree days.

And YIPEE for your docs thinking outside the box with WTF. I think this is the way to go. Keeping fingers crossed.

Word verification=drsmam. That seems like a good omen to me.

Anonymous Ortizzle said...

Cool moms are moms who do tell other parents what their plans are and if they are going to be late. You're a very cool mom!

Great news about the dietician. You just keep nagging these people so they get everyone possible in on the picture.

Miss Gun-Totin' America: That's one exception I would make, too.


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