This week, during our nightly small talk:
Susie: So did you see about the astronauts trying to kill each other!?
Jif: She didn't actually kill her. The woman was trying to steal her man, what was she supposed to do?
Susie: She drove across the country in a diaper!
Jif: If someone were trying to steal me, wouldn't you drive across the country in a diaper?
Susie: Oh, sure . . . and if someone were trying to steal me, would you drive across the country in a diaper?
Jif: If someone were trying to steal you, I would drive across the country with a diaper on my head!
OK, I have no idea what that means, but it cracked me up then, and it still does.
But really. Did you ever in your life? Let's break this down:
1. "I want you so much that I will kill anyone who tries to keep you from me." Many people may have this as a fleeting thought. A number of people actually act on such a thought. (Yes, I said "actually act." You wanna make something of it? Don't make me put a diaper on my head and come after you . . . ) And almost all of us can understand the sentiment, having had a sliver of such an emotion, on some level at some time in life. But then there's:
2. "I want you so much that I will drive across the country in a diaper to shoot an astronaut with a BB gun, to keep her away from you!" I think even the people who are doing time for actually acting on #1 (above) are looking at this story and scratching their heads. I mean, that has to be a rather unique state of mind, wouldn't you say?
file under: &Family &Can't Make This Stuff Up &I'm Just Sayin'