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Wednesday, August 30, 2006

My Brain is Unremarkable

That's the word from the New Rollogist. I'm trying not to take offense. This means they're 95% sure that one of the illnesses they were considering will not be the BIG WIENER in the reality show that has become my life, "Name that Disease!" I know that some of you whom I've emailed are wondering about the nasty three-letter mofo. I don't have a definite rule-out on that yet; it isn't necessarily indicated on a brain MRI. I will tell you just as soon as I can celebrate crossing that one off the list. There are still many possibilities. Two doctors mentioned a "rare rheumatological illness" in recent days, so we'll be looking at that, too. (Although I prefer the term, "exotic," instead of "rare.") When I went to look it up, I found websites for it, so I was thinking, "Oh, good, there's a lot of info about it . . . " until I saw that the website had a "Memory Wall" page in it, then I was all, "Aw, #^$&!" Because, and I should have put this in my "How to Be Sick" instructions, you just don't want to pick an illness whose website features a freakin' memory wall, or quilt, or any such damned thing as that.

I love me some Little Richard. Always have. Shut up! What's not to love? Last night we saw this commercial, and I laughed, as I do every time:



I had just been asking Jif, "Do you think I present as 'sick enough' when I see these docs?" because I still try to be pleasant, and funny, and whatnot. And Jif, who's been going with me to appointments, said that he thinks I do, that they should be getting the message that I'm plenty sick.

Then he says, "Hey, you should take Little Richard with you. He could tell them, 'Help her!'"

"What do you think I take you for? You're supposed to be my Little Richard! Tell them to help me!"

So Jif does his best Little Richard, "HELP HER! SOMEBODY HELP HER! WOOOOOOOHOOO!"

And I laugh 'til I snort. "Now, that's what I'm talkin' about!"

And he says, "Right. Then they'd shoot me, thinking that would help you."

36 heads are better than one . . .

Blogger eclectic said...

Your brain is plenty remarkable, it's just new-rolligists have no sense of humor. It's their job. So glad to hear from you, Sis!

 
Blogger Nina said...

I laugh everytime I see that commercial. I want to see Jif doing his best Little Richard, "HELP HER! SOMEBODY HELP HER! WOOOOOOOHOOO!"
But honey, you shouldn't have to present as 'sick enough' when you see these doctors. But I know how it goes and I hate it . . .
Sending lots of love your way.

 
Blogger Squirl said...

I love that commercial, and Little Richard, too! Yes, at least an audioblog of Jif doing Little Richard would be worth a lot of hits to your site. :)

Still have my fingers crossed that there's no stupid three-letter thingy going on in your brain. I can't wait for the day when you tell us that they've figured it out and it's 100% treatable and cureable. Because that's what's gonna happen. I said so.

Love ya, sis!

 
Blogger ieatcrayonz said...

Oh please rule out that dreaded 3-letter disease soon.

Nope, I don't think you want to pick one with a memory wall either. How about a survivor wall? Maybe we should make a page just for you and the WTF disease.

If you love Little Richard, you should watch the Celebrity Duets show, or whatever it's called. Little Richard is a judge. He made me laugh last night, but I kept wondering if he recently had a stroke.

 
Blogger LadyBug said...

I'm giggling here, at you and Jif and Little Richard. Hee.

I'm glad your brain is unremarkable in a good way. And hey, the doctors probably just won't use the term "exotic," because they're afraid you'll catch on that they're flirting with you.

Love, hugs, and prayers to you, Mis Susie.

 
Blogger Susie said...

I love you ladies :)
eclectic, it does seem to be rare to find a doc with a healthy sense of humor. I think I have a couple, now. Like the one who said, animatedly, "I don't know what THE HELL is wrong with you!" I appreciated that, because that's exactly what I was wondering, "What THE HELL is wrong with me?!"

nina, *sigh* I know; I am learning so much about being a patient. It SUCKS.

from your mouth to God's ears, my squirly girl :) I'll see if I can talk Jif into it ;)

crayonlips, yea, I will feel so much better knowing that's not an option. I'd love to see that show, I'll have to look for it. And I think he might have had a stroke. He's about 90, you know.

ladybug, that's true; the flirting docs are such a problem ;) I think it's my mouth sores, so appealing to those medical types.

 
Blogger Mr. Bloggerific Himself said...

I like Little Richard too and was really glad to see him on Duets last night. He's one funny dude. Though, yeah, I kinda don't want him going to the doc with me. Sorry, Little Richard.

 
Blogger WILLIAM said...

"What Was I Thinking the Reality Show" has a nice ring to it. I can picture the show the now.

"A group of bloggers are broken into four teams and each has the challenge to diagnos Gumby Susie. Each week the teams will go head to head in different challenges to make Susie laugh. The losing team will have to vote someone out. The four team leaders are Bucky, Jimbo, Circus Kelli and Eclectic."

 
Blogger Bucky Four-Eyes said...

I get to be a team leader? That is a sure sign of the apocalypse.

If Jif is to be your Little Richard, he must learn to refer to himself in the third person. WOOOOOOOing is good, but he needs to be just a little more off his rocker...

 
Anonymous peaches said...

I've been away for a bitt and was just catching up. Love the photos of your get away.

I'm glad you're keeping your sence of humor.

 
Blogger dashababy said...

Susie, I love those commercials too. There's another one out there with the guy that does all the movie trailer intros, hysterical.
I love Little Richard too, he was so funny last night on Celebrity duets. If laughter is the best medicine, this show will cure ya or make you forget about it for a minute at least.
Hugs and love to you. xoxoxo

 
Blogger Effie said...

I think you have a rather remarkable brain, my dear! I mean--it turns pink on command! What more could you ask for??!!

I'm glad ONE thing is ruled out--now 2,398,486,107,651.7 more to go--you can do it!

I've never seen that commercial before--cute!

Hugs, my friend! & constant prayers going out for you!

 
Blogger OldHorsetailSnake said...

Yeah, Little Richard cracks me up, too.

Checked your vacation report -- glad to see you had a nice getaway, Suse.

 
Anonymous sharkey said...

Can't wait 'til you're singing about mashed potatoes, gravy, and cranberry sauce. I'd pay money to see you and Jif re-enact the commercial. Not a lot of money, mind you, but some.

Still praying for ruling out the nasty mofo, and any other disease that involves a Memory Wall.

 
Blogger SoozieQ said...

No, no memory walls or quilts for you and your WTF disease.

Instead I say we have "Memory Panties" where you told the WTF Disease to kiss your a$$.

Hoping you hear something soon and it's better than "rare" or "exotic"....something more along the lines of "history" or "outta here"

 
Blogger Andrea said...

I agree with ladybug...I'm glad your brain is unremarkable (IN THIS WAY...because as others have said, we know it is QUITE remarkable in other ways ;) ). Still hoping a full rule-out will come, but also hoping a diagnosis for something treatable will come to you soon.

 
Blogger Circus Kelli said...

Susie - It's not often that Hubby reads blogs over my shoulder. Tonight, he did and we watched the Little Richard ad together for the first time and we laaaauuugggghhheeddd. :)

Love you!

Your brain? Unremarkable?! What does that guy know, anyway...

 
Blogger Traci said...

Gawd, I love you.

As for the remarkable brain, I was just saying the other day as I looked at your brain pics again... "Would you just LOOK at the brain on Susie?" So don't let just any joe shmoe tell you it's UNremarkable, they clearly know not of which they speak.

I'm just sayin...

 
Anonymous stringmuse said...

Of course your brain is remarkable, Susie. You always knew howdadodese confounded algebra problems in school. The doctor suffers from an unremarkable vocabulary.

I'm trying to figure out the three-letter disease thing. PMS? RPM? VIP? NFL? MTV? DNA?

Love and prayers...

 
Blogger Nilbo said...

We are living in a world where an unremarkable brain is good news, and three letter diseases are referred to by four letter words.

I, for one, love this world. And I am so very happy to be in it with you, Miss Susie.

 
Blogger Amy said...

Ach mein gut the memory wall! Thanks for sharing but here's susie's hat whatzer hurry eh?
I love your brain, Susie. And Jif's LR impression too.

 
Blogger Momentarily_Distracted said...

I'm with Soozieq on her idea.

I lub the commercial.
"Mashed potatoes! Grrravy! Woooo!"

 
Blogger The other me said...

I live in the Uk...so that commercial, never seen it, I wish you could have shared in that glorious 'first time viewing 'snort, add to that 3 little boys under 6 who saw it too....little boy guffaws. thankyou. Here's hoping your unremarkable brain keeps finding funny stuff for us all to laugh at.

 
Blogger Circus Kelli said...

Whoa! I'm a team leader? Against Bucky? Oh man... my team is so screwed...

 
Blogger eclectic said...

It's okay, CK... you and I will have a secret conspiracy and, and, and... what? OOOOH, Bucky reads these comments? Crap. I'm in twubble.

 
Blogger Circus Kelli said...

Eclectic - Maybe we can distract her with something shiny... ;)

 
Blogger Susie said...

mrB, I must check my local listings. I don't know this duets show. I think Little Richard would be a hoot at the docs'. In fact, I think just hanging out with him would be good medicine. But I'd probably want an "off" switch on him somewhere.

william, I'd watch. And very capable team leaders you've chosen. But the idea of voting somebody off just doesn't sit right. I'd miss 'em too much. And that's kinda what I fear now; in fact, there's the prayer of the day: "Dear God, please don't vote Susie off the island. Amen."

bucky, of course you've been designated as "leader" before; you're probably just more accustomed to "ring" in front of it, instead of "team." And I am doing more than my share to put Jif off his rocker, believe me ;)

peaches, I'm trying. So hard. I hope you are well, my sweet, juicy friend.

dashababymama, "In a world where both of our cars were completely underwater..." I like that one, too. Hugging you back :)

effie, it is true; there are so MANY possibilities. No point thinking too much about any one until it's official.

hoss, thank you :) It was a lovely little respite.

sharkey, I'm not kidding, if, I mean, WHEN this all goes away, maybe that will be my gift to you all. Jif and I can do a commercial :) (I haven't told him, yet, though.)

soozieq, amen to ALL of that. You can model the memory panties, though. I'm already doing a commercial ;)

andrea, thank you, Andrea. That's it, exactly. Treatable, curable, go-away-able. Can't ask for more than that.

CK, oh, that tickles me that you and Hubby were laughing at my blog together :)

traci, clearly you are a woman who KNOWS from brains :)

stringmuse PMS has been confirmed. It now looks like my RPMs are all out of wack. And I may need new shocks and struts, too. (I emailed you. Nice to see you here :)

nilbo, what the HELL office are you running for? Up in here being all sweet twice in a row . . .

amy I love your brain, too. It's a kind, funny one.

MoDis, oh, then you can model the memory panties, too! WOOOOOOOHOOO!

t.o.m., aw, I love the thought of your beautiful family laughing at that. Thanks for letting me know, and I'm glad to share :)

CK, I can't argue with you, there . . .

eclectic, you mean, an ALLIANCE? Oh, this is getting serious . . .

CK, that could work; just have to put the shiny in a strategic location...

 
Blogger Effie said...

Does it mean if there's teams that somebody's gonna get picked last? I HATE that--I'm always one of the last chosen for baseball, etc.

Pick me! Pick me!

I'm pretty sure it wouldn't be the kind of reality show where people get voted off...just weirder and weirder stuff is required...

 
Blogger Annejelynn said...

I never thought I'd ever say this, and never thought that I'd ever be in the position to say I'd never thought this:

Little Richard just made my day

Hang in there, Susie!

 
Blogger barbschellenberg said...

Just wanted to let you know that you will be in my prayers :)

 
Blogger Von Krankipantzen said...

Well, the search goes on but I think an unremarkable brain is a good start. No matter how insulting it sounds. I think having your own Little Richard is absolutely the key to getting through this with your humour intact. The docs need a shake up like that too. I am laughing just thinking about it.

 
Blogger Kat said...

Saw this commercial on TeeVee last night and almost wet myself laughing picturing it in a doctor's office. Sending you happy thoughts today.

 
Blogger Bucky Four-Eyes said...

I think when the docs have it all figured out and you're past all this WTF nonsense and feeling better, you should come up here and get a Little Richard tattoo. We can have a girls' tattoo day.

Or we can all get secret butt tattoos.

 
Blogger Bucky Four-Eyes said...

Oh, and there are SHINY THINGS?

 
Blogger Bone Machine said...

That Little Richard commercial is my current favorite commercial on the air. It never ceases to make me laugh.

 
Blogger RitaPita said...

Susie..

A Little Richard story for you. I wasn't there, but heard it second hand from my mom.

About ten years ago My mom and step dad where at Cedar Point in Sandusky Ohio. They decided to hop on the mono rail like thing that takes you around the park, a little romantic pause, if you will. (this attraction may or may not still be there, but I digress)..

Anyhow, they were so crowded that the rides operators were putting random people into cars together. So when my parents romantic ride was interrupted by a guest, they were very angry. Until they saw who the person was.

Yep.

Little Richard.

Everyone gets on the car and LR is totally oblivious to my mom freaking the hell out. They get about five minutes into the ride, silent.

All of a sudden, LR starts talking to my mom and asks her where she is from, her name, etc.

She tells him her name and asks what his is. At this point everyone knows that she knows who he is.

He looks at her very seriously and says. "Richard".

At which point my mom starts laughing hysterically.

He doesn't talk to her after that.

The End.

 


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