Music Appreciation 101
In a restaurant earlier this week, some lame '80s* song comes on the Muzak.
LG asks, "What kind of music is this?"
I'm not in love . . . it's just a silly phase I'm going through...
"I guess you'd call this 'pop,'" I tell her, as I check out the menu.
"There are a lot of different kinds of music, aren't there?" she asks.
"Oh, yea. Dozens, probably hundreds," I agree.
"What are they?"
Jif joins in, "There's rock, metal . . . "
"Country, jazz, pop, hip-hop, alternative, classical . . . " I continue.
"There's rap music," LG contributes.
"Yep, rap . . ." I say.
Then she says, "What is crap music, is that like rap music?"
Jif snorts. "CRAP music?"
"Yea, it comes on the radio a lot, but Mama doesn't like it . . ."
"WHAT?" I am scrambling to catch up, although I think I know where this is heading.
"Yea, you always say, 'I can't listen to crap,' and you change the station."
"Oh, yea. You're right, there is crap music."
"Mama, how do you tell crap music from the other kinds?"
I keep your picture upon the wall . . . it hides a messy stain that's lying there...
"You hear that? Crap music has lyrics like that."
Big boys don't cry, big boys don't cry...
Yea, unless they have to listen to crap like that. That song is by "10cc," whose name always reminded me of having to produce a urine specimen on demand.
So tell me some lyrics that are your idea of "crap music."
CORRECTION: Closet Metro has advised me that this was a '70s song. It sure sounds like '80s, but I stand corrected on that crap.