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Thursday, September 28, 2006

A Note from School: Say What?

Just before LG entered first grade, we stretched our budget in order to move into a public school district that is among the best in the state. Not only do they have excellent teachers, but they have really cool after-school programs. LG just enrolled in an after-school language immersion class -- French and German, this semester. After the first class, I received the following email from the coordinator of the program, a former president of the PTA at "Cool School." We scrimp and sacrifice so that our Cool School kid can learn, among other things, how to communicate effectively:

The dismissal process at Cool School was a bit hectic last week due to so many wonderful after-school activities. Talks between the PTA and the Cool School administration have established a way for teachers to easily view which students go to a particular PTA sponsored after-school activity on a daily basis. This should help to prevent confusion for teachers, staff, and for students. Parents do not need to write a reminder to teachers for after-school activities weekly. I suggest that you send a note to your child'’s teacher to inform him/her of your child'’s participation. If your child is enrolled in other after-school activities, you may want to include the day and that activity as well. Please remind children who normally take the bus home from school that they have an after-school activity. Bus riders are dismissed prior to children for after-school activities. If a child is missing from the language class, I would first check with the school office to make sure the child was not absent that day. If the child was at school, I would then start to call the emergency numbers provided on the registration form. I will not stop calling until I reach someone! You may want to talk to your child about a plan if this ever occurs, for example what neighbor they could go to for help.

Um....alrighty then. Maybe I'll go to a neighbor for help in figuring out what this email says...

file under: &Family

22 heads are better than one . . .

Blogger Mr. Bloggerific Himself said...

Sheesh. We had two tags, each a different color and shape. The one shaped like a car meant a parent would pick up the boy. The one shaped like a bus meant the boy would ride the bus.

I like our system a bit better.

Oooh! How about a flowchart?! Everybody LOVES flowcharts!! You know, like an oval starting it all off that leads to a diamond where you have to make a decision and then based on that decision you have to choose which shape is next, and so on? And then you could scan the eyeballs of each children to make certain he, or she, is in fact allowed to go such-n-such program where a DNA testing, along with a urine sample...

 
Blogger Susie said...

mrB, HA! Yea, I was with you right up until the time you had the kids peeing .... heeeheee

 
Blogger Nina said...

Huh?? Okay then . . . must be the example of how to communicate ineffectively.

 
Blogger Mr. Bloggerific Himself said...

Everybody pees (and poops). In fact, just a few moments ago I...yeah, never mind.

 
Anonymous Katy said...

Sounds like Mr. Kimball from "Green Acres" wrote this!

 
Blogger Karen said...

That kind of thing just makes me crazy. (Well, crazier than usual, I mean.)

 
Blogger LadyBug said...

I don't even know where to begin with that one, so I'll just say Hi.

 
Blogger Circus Kelli said...

Good God, that's horrible.

Did you send an email back saying "Um... what?"

 
Blogger Kat said...

Maybe it makes sense in a foreign language, you know, the one without edit.

 
Blogger Kentucky Brat said...

maybe you could change your blog name to "What ARE YOU Thinking?"

maybe?

 
Anonymous peaches said...

Well, i'm not exactly sure whats being said but i'll take a stab at it.

They want to make sure the children are accounted for and where they are supposed to be.

Thats all I got. Seem it could have been shortened down by 90%.

Hugs and Love to you.

 
Blogger Jomama said...

I was wondering if you were going to sum it up at the end and I was happy to see that it made no sense to you either. I hate reading stuff like that.

I feel like they are trying to say that kids are cutting after school activities or just to make sure someone knows where your kid is at all times. I'm not going to try reading it anymore because it's really giving me a headache.

 
Blogger eclectic said...

Hunh??

 
Blogger WILLIAM said...

"Do you walk to school or carry your lunch?"

Was what an old friend of mine used to say when he would get letters from school that made no sense.

 
Blogger Candace said...

Wait. First they say that written notes to teachers aren't necessary and then in the VERY NEXT SENTENCE it says that they encourage you to write a note to your child's teacher.

I'm so confused.

 
Blogger Lynn said...

Perhaps the school offers a language immersion class for English. It seems certain staff members should attend.

 
Blogger decrepitoldfool said...

that is hilarious! No wait, it's sad. No - hilarious!

Richard Feynman reading someone's paper from a sociology conference, mystified by the academic jargon:

"Finally I said to myself, 'I'm gonna stop, and read one sentence slowly, so I can figure out what the hell it means.

So I stopped - at random - and read the next sentence very carefully... "The individual member of the social community often receives his information via visual, symbolic channels." I went back and forth over it, and translated. You know what it means? "People read.""

But at least that sentence was logical! It really bugs me when people who are tasked with communicating don't even check to see if they're making any sense at all.

 
Blogger Traci said...

Sounds like someone needs to be a STUDENT at Cool School instead of a person in charge eh??? This sounds like alot of the people who work at the same school district I work at too. Oy!

 
Blogger Susie said...

nina, yea, sometimes bad examples are helpful :)

mrB, thank you for sharing (not).

katy, ha! I had forgotten him, but I saw a rerun last night. And you make me think of this guy called "Mr. Double Talk," Derwood or Derwin something or other. He's on TV talking nonsense to people on the street, and they usually agree with him even though he said nothing at all.

karen, I know, sometimes I think they're just TRYING to make us lose it ;)

Hi, ladybug! :)

ck, no, I didn't respond. Except here ;)

kat, now that would be a good explanation. It is, after all, about a foreign language class. Or maybe it is a test, maybe we were supposed to edit it and return . . .

KYbrat, ya think? ;)

peaches, yea, I'm sure you're right. "Make sure your kids go where they're supposed to, and we'll try to make sure we know where they are." That's about it.

JOMAMA!, sorry for the headache. It's nice to see you here :)

eclectic, see, you are truly my sister; that's exactly what I said.

william, perfect, that should have been the title for this post!

candace, yea, that's when I first realized it was going to be one of THOSE. Wait, I send a note? I don't send a note? OK, one of THOSE...

lynn, ha, I'll put that in the suggestion box ;)

DoF, is it really you, and not the Mrs.? Either way, yes, indeed. By the time such messages are distilled, it often turns out they're not necessary anyway. Who needs to read that people read? Academic jargon, from any discipline, is the worst: the more words I use, the smarter I will sound!

traci, I know I'm a little nitpicky, but I do want school communications to be clear. (Perhaps hypocritical from one who rambles as much as I, but still...)

 
Blogger MrsDoF said...

Of course he's the real deal!
I sent Husband over when I saw the post was about a message from school.
He proved to be an expert in dealing with Authorities through the raising of three intelligent sons.
I knew he'd get a kick out of this, but I didn't expect him to quote Feynman.

 
Blogger Ortizzle said...

Well, now. *That* was informative. Whoever wrote that little missive should be in charge of all the kids who miss the bus or don't get picked up after school. Cuz it'll be their fault.

Hilarious... and tragic :-)

 
Blogger Mainline Mom said...

THAT is atrocious. My dad seriously would have either called the person that wrote the letter or proofread it in red ink and mailed it back to her. He did this a lot, it was a sickness.

 


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