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Friday, October 13, 2006

Pardon the Intruption

As anyone who's ever been a parent -- or a kid -- knows, sometimes certain family members behave badly. They drive other family members crazy, with their not listening, and their interrupting, and their going on and on and not really saying anything helpful, and sometimes they yell, which is just rude. These certain family members, we'll call them . . . "parents," sometimes need to be reminded of the rules.

LG's Rules

Good thing these "parents" have kids, to offer guidance when they go astray.

(LG delivered these rules to us one evening after there had been way too much math homework drama. They're good rules. It occurred to me as I did the post-mortem on a most unpleasant evening, that we've been blessed to have her for 10 years. The time she has lived with us to date is probably longer than the time she will live with us in the future. Eight years from now, when she will probably leave our home, it will not matter whether the freakin' math homework was done to our liking. So many things won't matter -- homework, clean room, clothing choices -- what will matter, what will always matter, is the relationship. How foolish and short-sighted of us to risk harming our relationship for the sake of good grades or made beds or fashion. It's good to be reminded of the rules.)

file under: &Family

28 heads are better than one . . .

Blogger Mr. Bloggerific Himself said...

Now THAT is a message SO many parents could learn from.

"How foolish and short-sighted of us to risk harming our relationship for the sake of good grades or made beds or fashion."

Awesome.

 
Blogger Susie said...

Aw, thanks, mrB. Not bad for the town drunk, eh? ;)

 
Blogger LadyBug said...

Those are great rules. Not just for parenting, but life in general.

That LG is a wise little girl.

 
Blogger Mr. Bloggerific Himself said...

Yeah, not bad, Otis. Not bad at all.

By the way, have you seen Ernest T. Bass lately? I've got a brick and some broken glass I need to speak with him about.

 
Blogger WILLIAM said...

#3 is my favorite

 
Blogger Platypus said...

That's a great post, Susie, and I'm with you on the rules thing. I'll try and focus on that more - there's way too much hormonr-fuelled drama in our house.

And I love rule number 2. Quite right. :)

 
Blogger eclectic said...

I am so pleased that LG has the sense of person to feel comfortable making rules! But beyond that, her spelling of "intrupt" makes me giggle with happiness. Also, I'm relieved that I'm not the only "good parent" who needs -- and receives -- instruction from my kids. This post makes my day!

Oh, and if you're the town drunk, that makes me maybe Howard Sprague?

 
Blogger Karen said...

What, is there something in the air? We had our own math homework drama over here. I didn't get any rules, but I sure got told that everything bad in the world was my fault. (You know, it would be kind of nice to think that everything bad in the world would go away if only I didn't nag my 10-year-old to do his math homework.)

 
Blogger Squirl said...

You're a wise parent to understand her rules. Don't "they" say to not sweat the small stuff? It's hard to remember that you need to pick your battles when you're in the middle of it.

Looks like you've brought your kid up right. :)

 
Blogger Circus Kelli said...

You've done a fine job there, Miss Susie and Mr. Jif.

Thanks for the reminder, LG!

Hugs!

 
Blogger Effie said...

LG makes me smile. And so do you!

Did the Math drama ever come to resolution?

 
Blogger Mr. Bloggerific Himself said...

Ooh, Ooh! Can I be Goober?! Oh, wait, too late.

 
Blogger Lynn said...

There's lots of homework drama around here, too. But, I suffer it quietly these days simply because I don't have the energy to make a stink about anything. Maybe when I feel better, I can take a lesson from LG's rules. What a sweet and cute little angel.

 
Blogger Von Krankipantzen said...

A great gift to a child. Power and contorl over her life. Feeling that she can impose her own rules. Cool.

 
Blogger Momentarily_Distracted said...

Those are good rules!
Especially the not yelling part.
:o)

 
Anonymous Daphne said...

These are good rules indeed. I really like #2--hard to do but great to aspire to.

 
Blogger Traci said...

Out of the mouths of babes eh? Good work dearie...in the training of LG and in the listening to her. All children should be so blessed. Amen.

 
Blogger Bucky Four-Eyes said...

Personally, I'm still disappointed that it didn't really say "drunkard" in your last post.

 
Blogger Andrea said...

I hope Audrey will still be communicating with me so directly and clearly when she reaches that age! That is awesome...no whining, just simple statements about what she needs from you. Love it.

 
Blogger Candace said...

The rules were great, but even better was what you learned from them. I'm definitely going to keep that lesson in mind, as my oldest is turning ten next year.

It's all so fleeting, isn't it?

 
Blogger Susie said...

ladybug, she does amaze and humble me. I guess that's our kids' job :)

mrB, Ernest T., my favorite poet! ;)

william, that is the toughest one, sometimes.

platypus, oh, dear, we still have the hormones to "look forward" to. Yikes.

eclectic, I'm glad she does, too. I would never have spoken up at her age, or even well beyond, if I felt my rights weren't being honored. Thank you.
And, nice moustache.

karen, well of course everything wrong is your fault, and did you also get that you never do anything for him, and blame him for everything? If not, it'll come soon. Hang in there :)

squirl, if I were all that wise, she probably wouldn't need to write her rules. Not sweating the small stuff is good advice; somehow in parenting it is harder for me than in other areas of life.

ck, thank you. We make a lot of mistakes; the best we can hope is to take responsibility and try not to keep making the same ones.

effie, ha. That is an ongoing drama, I fear. A series . . .

mrB, oh hell yea, you've got Goober sewn up :)

lynn, I'm sorry you're not feeling well. I don't know why homework these days must be so dramatic. But it is, it seems.

kranki, thank you. We were still upset with her when she delivered the rules, but we were very proud of her for them. I think you articulated why that was :)

MoDis, I actually have an advantage in the not yelling thing now. WTF makes it very difficult.

daphne, thank you :) I've noticed in my work, a lot of kids complain about their parents intrupting.

traci, thank you :) And thank you so much for what you sent. My doc is looking into it. (Please, God.)

bucky, just because it didn't say they were drunkards, doesn't mean they weren't. Plenty of drunkards and a handful of druggards in the Wienerschnitzel tree, sis.

andrea, who says there's no whining? ;) There occasionally is, but, yes, I do hope she will be open and assertive with us, with everyone.

candace, that's just it. It is so fleeting. And so much of what creates distress in family life will be irrelevant 5 years or even 5 days from now.

 
Blogger Angi said...

I LOVE IT!!!!

 
Blogger Traci said...

Susie, darlin', I totally second that Please God. MWAH!

 
Blogger Rick said...

Man, I hope your blog is still around in a year or so when we start having children; So I can get advice from you and your ten-year-old. Ya'll are right up there with Dr. James Dobson. (that's meant to be a compliment just in case you don't agree with him)

 
Blogger Susie said...

angi, welcome, and thank you :)

traci, thanks, honey.

rick, well, I am glad you clarified ;) There are some things JD says/writes that I would certainly embrace. He's a spanker, though. I say spanking is not for children. William Sears is a great, non-hitting Christian parenting expert. And I loves me some Super Nanny. A year or so, eh? It will be the most amazing, terrifying journey of your life :)

 
Blogger Nina said...

Smart girl, that Miss LG! It goes by too quickly . . . they are here and gone. (Sigh)
To hear my kids tell it, I was the best mom ever.
The last time they were all here together . . .(which isn't often enough) they were talking about me amongst themselves. I over heard well Mom didn't even ever yell . . . at that point I had to interrupt and ask did you all grow up in my house? Because I remember being upset at times and yelling. Shawna said maybe a few but you always apologized right after, saying it wasn't us you were upset with. Ben saying I don't remember you ever yelling. Michael adding that he didn't remember that either.
Okay I was there so I know I yelled . . . Then I thought thank you God, they remember more of the good than the bad. I'm sure as heck not going to burst their bubble. :)

 
Blogger rawmind said...

what great rules , think we could all learn something from them . thanks

 
Blogger Annejelynn said...

this is a fabulous post ~ and your lil' LG is a fantastic kid!

 


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